Our mess is our message
Personal thoughts about how we move forwärd together
This was a difficult episode for me to record and share but it comes from a place of love and light. I felt that it is important for me to speak to where I am at this point in this historical moment. In this week’s solo episode, I share my frustrations and sadness around the current state of affairs in our country and around the globe. I talk about the documentary, “13th” by Ava DuVernay and its effect on me — by the way, I highly recommend watching it. I share my thoughts about the anger and violence I’ve been seeing in the news and in my Twitter feed. I also speak to the amazingly powerful things I’m seeing like “Uncomfortable Conversations with a Black Man” with Emmanuel Acho and S05 of Queer Eye with the Fab 5 and how these are some of the role models that I believe are pivotal in this work towards finding our way forward as we stand together for change as peaceful warriors.
“O, let America be America again—
The land that never has been yet—
And yet must be—the land where every man is free.”
LINKS
13th (documentary on Netflix)
Uncomfortable Conversations with a Black Man with Emmanuel Acho
036: Shaun Don Tha Truth — Finding Your Voice and Loving Your Story
Robin Roberts (who says in her MasterClass, “Your mess is your message")
TRANSCRIPT
[0:00] Music.
[0:08] Welcome to artful,a community. Committed to championing artists and creative misfits from all walks of life. This show gives you an insiders look into the rial, scrappy lives of artists creating with purpose,
including interviews with beatboxers, graffiti writers, DJs, chefs, photographers, designers, illustrators, filmmakers, and music artists from around the globe, as well as insights and inspiration from yours truly.
I'm Gabe Ratliff, an award-winning artist, coach, entrepreneur and fellow misfit. All right, let's do this.
[0:39] Music.
[0:51] I saw this woman yesterday. It was going around on Twitter. This woman just was like going off on this Asian girl who was stretching at the stairs.
And she's like, just going off on her for nothing likes. And she's telling her to get out of here.
You know, she doesn't belong here and that she was blocking the stairs, and she's like there stairs all over.
Meanwhile, it's a fucking park like you can walk on the grass and she's just like yelling at this girl.
And the girl is being very chill, and she's being mean.
And this like old white woman.
And then at the end, she's like, Why are you wearing black in California Sun like she's actually judging her for wearing black like workout gear.
If she's stretching to go run, you know. And so she's in, like black workout clothes.
And I'm just like, How are you that angry? You know, like I'm watching, like that's the things that I'm seeing.
[1:51] Uh, just people being so despicable. And I'm just like, how you like, How are you not exhausted being that angry for no fucking reason, you know, So, like, that's the things that I'm seeing.
But I feel like that does No, that doesn't seem relevant to me about my show and my mission, you know? So I'm conflicted. It's like I want I want to be.
I want to share how I feel, you know on and the things that are on the other side that are, like, beautiful and like You know how people are showing up in amazing ways.
I don't know if you saw the Emanuel Ah chou, the football player. He's doing the uncomfortable conversations with a black man.
You just started that I've been promoting those but this the one he just did was with Matthew McConaughey, where they sit down together.
The 1st 1 was just himself. It's amazing, cause he lays out like, what are we looking for in allies? Like what does this mean? What does that mean? You know what? Where are we?
But then he did this one with Matthew McConaughey and McConnell had put some questions together like you know, t help us move forward.
It was a beautiful conversation, and it was, like, very authentic.
Um, and it was very like they were, like, letting each other, like share where they were coming from. And it was like, you could you could see there was this purpose of moving forward, but has me just really confused.
[3:19] About how to move forward because I was very clear about how to move forward Up until last week, I have no idea how to move forward now.
That's why last week I was just like I'm just going to cut this from the mastermind where I talk about these two exercises I did and how they were helpful and like still honor the commitment I have.
But I just can't do it. I can't because I didn't want to record anything.
I didn't. I tried three days in a row and then this week I've gotten to Thursday and I'm like.
[3:54] I don't know what to say.
[3:58] Cause that's been like a big thing for me. Like it's like wanting toe have Alisher Ally ship and stand proud in my space is anti racist, especially after the things I've been watching and reading.
Um, but it's also like.
[4:15] Trying to figure out where my place is and all that. You know, um and like what I want to say right now, cause right now I'm just mad and I'm sad and I was ashamed and just see, I'm seeing such despicable people.
I highly recommend those the uncomfortable conversations with a black man because Makana actually reads a quote and I cant came for life.
Remember who it was for some reason, Think of Washington Carver, but I don't think that's who it was, but he reads this really awesome quote.
It was so beautiful, but he was basically saying, like we still haven't achieved the America that we set forth to be.
You know, we still haven't arrived and that's where I and that was something they were both. And I mean, even even Emmanuel sits back. He's like, Wow, that's powerful And it is because it's so true. Like we're not there. I just really appreciated.
[5:11] You know, to humans. Two different color.
[5:17] Meeting in the middle, tohave this,
compromising conversation about uncompromising as humans, you know, like how to move forward and like sharing this information of, like, what is it for you?
What is it like for you, black man?
Who's been, you know, amongst this community, it's been oppressed for 500 goddamn years, you know, Pardon my French.
And then and and then here I am recognising my privilege but wanting to be an ally, having this conversation, you know, and and then sharing that quote.
And it was really cool because he shared it. He had it. He was prepared, he had prepared questions.
And he, like, was getting answers for us and for himself, you know, But But he shared this quote, and I just was like, Man, that's really awesome because it was It was powerful because you realize, like, we have it yet.
And then I shortly after I saw this, like old woman like yelling at this Asian girl. And I'm like, What the fuck are you doing?
She's not like she's like this young, you know, young Asian girl just out like going to run and she's getting yelled at from this old white lady. And I'm like, How can you seriously be this like, angry.
[6:41] And I just don't get it? I just don't get it like how people have that I don't care about nurture versus nature.
Your parents didn't like, you know, whatever. I know that's part of the problem, cause I grew up in the South.
But it just I can't get it, you know? And it's just like it's driving me nuts because I I see and I just break down.
You know, I just break down because I like, I get I Then get angry.
I don't want to actually hurt that person, but I get so angry that I'm like, How can you want a fucking hurt this person, like, be so angry and like Like I could see she's like,
this old woman this old and I know I'm being like, completely not politically correct.
But like this elderly woman is like, so mad, you can see she's like wanting to be violent, like wanting to be physical with this young girl who could totally beat the shit out of her right, And I'm just like,
how can you be that angry to somebody you don't even know,
she's not done anything that she was like.
You've blocks the sidewalk and I'm like she blocked the sidewalk because she's stretching to go running in the park, that's public.
And I was thinking about how we have been arrived to this place of, like, what are what we actually set forth.
And then we watch the 13th last night. So it was like that was the ark of the day.
You know, we like, Watch that. And I was just like waterworks.
[8:06] But you think like this is they've been dealing with this. The sixties was just like a drop in the lake.
I'm not a violent person.
I hate bullies. My dad is a bully. I grew up being bullied.
I was bullied as a weirdo, you know? So I get it.
That's why I want to be a champion. For creative misfits, right is like That's part of where this all comes from its cause. Like I waas and I still fight that, you know, I'm fighting.
I want to be the champion for people who are being bullied.
And so, But now it's not just creatives, right? It's like now it's like an entire species of humans, right, that like where and I just I I want the same thing.
I want everyone to just be equal and have equity, not just equality but equity, because I learned the difference over the last couple years of my interviews and people I've been speaking to about race,
sexism, racism, all of it.
That being said, I watched this stuff and you see how corrupt like in the 13th right?
Like you just see how it's like there's so much money and there's so much power.
And there's so much commitment to the dark side.
[9:35] Because ever since the slave ships first left Europe and like brought people here, that's been their path of like being oppressed and being like less than.
[9:51] And it's like I keep thinking like, How do we How do we use our innovative creative brains to circumvent I'm not gonna do is use the word trump to circumvent this.
It's like how to be smart, how to be educated enough and informed enough how to be creative and innovative enough,
to build this army of people.
I talked about this with Sean Don on our episode about like being these like peaceful warriors, right? Like how to be peaceful words like love and light.
Okay, that's been my mission. Keep putting out positive things, and it's taking me a minute to, like, get this out.
But I was just trying to get to the fact that, like I get angry about it and I know violence isn't the answer, but it makes me so,
upset to see that somebody has that much physical aggression and anger in like, emotional,
like it's like, How are you that upset?
But it's these white white.
[11:01] You know what? I wonder? It's not generational, right? Like I used to think it's a generational thing.
Maybe this new generation's gonna have like, which I think they have on element of it.
I don't know. I just like that. There's so many questions right now, and it's just like when you watch the sixties and you see it's the same fucking thing the black man who's in this nice suit with a hat and he just keeps getting shoved by this white dude.
And then they cut to black girl in a crowd and there's like a guy who's in the Qantas club or one of those clubs, right?
And he's got the hat on and it's just this old white dude. And he's like, shoving like angrily, this black woman to get out of the crowd and you can see he's, like, so mad.
And it just makes me so upset. You know that. And I'm like, I don't I can't I can't understand how where that comes from. When they didn't do anything to you.
Like how you can be so mad. I I understand the like political slash religious wars, right?
Because they've it's got a very long.
[12:05] Hissed, sorted history right, and there's so much it's all again corrupt and like it's because people have been twisted.
And now people have gotten so smart about how to hack things and tweak things and, like, fake news.
And now fake news is fucked. Riel news, you know, and it's like it's gotten so twisted.
But even in. And what makes me so distraught about it?
Is it even in a pandemic we've broken was 110,000 and they're thinking 145 in the next couple of months, and I'm just like, how many fucking people do we have to lose?
Because now you have cops killing people.
I see stuff pop up on Twitter every day that they're not talking about on the news.
And I'm like, How much has toe happen? How many people have to finally be dead before people go? You know what?
[13:00] Maybe the police forces jacked up. Maybe the prison industrial complex is jacked up.
Maybe you know what? You are human. Why have I been so mad at? You know, it's like what does it take?
Because even when people lash out and shove people, the elderly man that got pushed and it cracked his head open. I was like I lost it.
I saw that. And you see the guy angrily. Just shove him this elderly man who is no threat.
And he cracks his fucking skull. And the guy next to him goes to help him, and he grabs him in the same guy that pushed him, picks him and pulls him over. And like, No, we had to keep going.
[13:42] And I'm just like you are. We pay for you to protect us, and you literally shoved this guy down and cracked his head open.
[13:53] For what? Like what? What happened to you?
One of the guys I follow, Matt D Avella. He just did. He was like, I didn't know what to say and do. And he did a video.
He's farther along as far as like being like a YouTube creator, you know? So he has a big audience, and he's actually asking them to donate.
They're gonna He and his wife were gonna match and oh, stuff. And I supported that. I shared that on, you know, because I want to help that cause Yeah, it's just like.
[14:23] I commend people. I said this to ice T I fall iced tea, and he's like, very broke right now, you know?
But he's been vocal, right? He had, like, body count and cop killer and all that stuff.
I mean, just 30 years ago, He's like, guys, I've been out here 30 plus years still doing my thing, and I actually responded.
I was like, You know what? Most of all, thank you for what you do, but thank you most of all for your persistence, because I mean, it's like beautiful to me when I think about how persistent they've been and you look at the thread of decades of like,
you know, Dr King and Malcolm X.
And like all of these people over the years, Maya Angelou you know Oprah Winfrey, like all of these people, and you're like God,
you have, like, elevated to this level of humanity that has over like it's over what we have done because we've had a silver spoon.
That's one thing about this morning we had a silver spoon in our mouths, our entire lives.
As white people, we've all had a silver spoon.
Doesn't matter how poor rich you've been. We've all had it.
And that's been that was the tough thing to swallow.
To be like, Doesn't matter how hard you had it.
[15:47] All of us have had a solution.
[15:51] Because of our skin, even though there's a lot of us out there like us that don't look at that, we don't think that way.
But like then you start to realize there's like being supportive of everyone, no matter their color.
But then there's being anti racist, and that's what's now come out,
about being an ally to people who deserve Ally ship and support because they haven't even gotten to the same level of equity and equality.
So it's just man, it's just tough. You know, the 13. Hey, watch it.
Go watch this stuff because I learned so much in that couple hours.
You know that you can read books, but to be able to watch that and have it be constructed for you in two hours and like, get this information and see that Ark That's the beauty of good storytellers like Eva,
is that you get this ark of like, this is what this shit has been like kids,
you know, and you have to understand, like people. It's out of sight, out of mind.
That's the problem. It's out of sight, out of mind, and they like when you realize that when the 13th Amendment was literally one of the early loopholes,
to keep slavery with a new name by the prison industrial complex,
and how they're just managed to keep that twisted.
[17:20] Fucked up and lucrative, like, ridiculously lucrative decision and it's like, Oh, no, we did it, We made it awesome, like we're good, We're awesome people.
We're free and you're like, No, no, and that's something that's been bothering me is like we're not free.
[17:40] Cause we're not the country that our ancestors set forth the foundation for us to eventually be that that's how I think we live.
Our best lives is a human right, like whether you believe in Christianity, Buddhism, whatever it might be.
You know, in all the religions and philosophies I've studied, I feel like it always just comes back to, like just being kind and loving and supportive and like finding purpose.
You know, that's come up a lot in my work, sharing with people like purpose.
It's like figure out your fear of your thing. What is it? What are the things you love? What are the things you're good at?
But then you find purpose, and that's like the third cog, you know, and I think that's the one that brings it all together. When you think about the meaning of life, it's like find purpose and then give meaning to what you do because you're helping others with it.
[18:43] That work has purpose. So even in times like this, where it's hard, it's what keeps you going, you know, and keeps you going through the hard times and like pushing forward, it's what's this?
What kept so many people of color and people who have been marginalized going because they have this purpose.
Whether you're looking to, you know, go to heaven or Ojala, you know, it's like just being a good human.
[19:18] But I just don't understand how it's so hard for people cause it's like they're afraid of something.
I think that's like the Boogey Man. These people are like the Boogeyman, somebody, whatever they want to call it, and I just don't get it cause it's not like going away, you know what I mean? Like, that's what I keep thinking about it like, it's not like these people are going away.
We can't It's never gonna be just a white world ever.
So it's like this like I don't understand. Yeah, yeah, Just at the 13th documentary, It's just Been Scott.
It's just been like weighing on me so heavy cause you think about decades and decades and decades and decades and like how politics,
and religion and and,
profit have all been in bed with each other for keeping people down like we just finished watching Queer Eye,
Season five and I literally was waterworks every single episode cause I'm like This is change.
This is change because they I mean, they're so good at their craft, no matter who it is, they're helping men. Women, gay, Straight, black, white doesn't matter.
[20:40] But you see the transformation occur over this week and you see these people find their value and they're worse and themselves again,
witnessing transformation occur and witnessing people empowered with for who they are like you know No, who know they are, and they're empowered in it.
They're not wavering in front of other people like Jonathan Van Ness is my favorite, this embodiment of non binary. I'm not a label.
I'm just me. You're just like I love you. You're so adorable and you're just being you.
Those are role models to me because they're such such ambassadors for being who you are owning your you know you're masses. Your message.
As Robin Roberts says.
[21:38] Music.
[21:45] Well, that's it for this episode, whether this is your first time listening or you're already a fan.
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Thanks again for listening until next time keep being.
[22:24] Music.
